Expectations & Silent Sunday
Watching our children learn, compete and improve in the game of soccer is fun for all parents. It is important that parents are involved and informed in their child's experiences in the club, but Chagrin Soccer also believes the role of a parent should be one of care and support.
We ask our parents to simply BEHAVE on the sidelines. As a result of this philosophy, should your actions directly conflict with any of these guidelines both you and your player will be subject to suspension.
1) Let the Coaches Coach:
There should only be one person/voice that coaches. If you are telling your son or daughter or any other player to do something, then you are coaching. The problem is compounded if you are instructing your son or daughter to do something that is different from what their coach is telling them. This creates confusion and distraction.
2) Let the Kids Play:
Soccer is a difficult game. It is made even more difficult when parents are yelling from the sidelines. Encourage them, cheer for them, but do not go beyond this.
3) Do Not Discuss the Play of Any Players in Front of Other Parents:
Negative comments are hurtful and unnecessary and kill parent harmony – something that is essential to a team’s experience and success.
4) Your Children Listen:
A negative parent attitude often results in a negative child’s attitude. There is no quicker way to erode teamwork or have a child not listen to instructions than to have their parent tell them that "your coach doesn't know what they are doing" or "Player X is an awful player and everyone knows it".
5) Do Not Complain About Your Son or Daughter’s Coaches to Other Parents:
Complaining is contagious. If you have an issue, speak to your coach. If the issue is not important enough to speak to your coach about it, then don’t complain to others. Please remember that our REC and Travel coaches are not professional coaches – they are youth trainers, volunteers and parents just like you.
6) Positive Comments from the Sideline:
Make positive comments from the sidelines! You can often see a young player making an extra effort when they hear encouraging words.
7) Negative Comments About the Other Team:
Players from both teams are children. These young players are not professionals. Speaking about the other team is tasteless, classless and reflects back poorly on Chagrin Soccer. This will not be tolerated.
8) Interaction with Parents from the Other Team:
These parents are not the enemy. In many cases, there can be some great conversations or discussions amongst parent groups. On the other hand, if these parents are not representing their team and their club in a positive way, do not come down to their level.
Outbursts towards the referee or the other team send a terrible signal to our children on the field. Giving them the impression that blaming refs or others for a bad result, sets them up for excuse making and bad habits. Blaming others is not a formula for success in sports or in life.
10) ‘It Was in the Heat of the Moment’:
We all feel things and are tempted to say things in the ‘heat of the moment’. Our Chagrin Soccer players who do things in the ‘heat of the moment’ receive a yellow or red card, get called for fouls, etc. So, we should apply similar standards to our own sideline behavior.
Like your child who will make mistakes during a game, so will a referee. These referees are learning and improving, and your feedback is not needed or welcome, regardless of how good or bad you think they are doing. Many of our refs are children. Verbal abuse from parents and their negativity often drive these refs to tears. Many never come back to refereeing. Simple request…please behave.
Silent Sunday is an annual event for all Ohio Travel Soccer League (OHTSL) teams. The date for Silent Sunday is determined by OHSTL and is posted on their website calendar as well as communicated by Chagrin Soccer Association to our program members. This day has become a traditional day for players to work on their team communication skills within their team without the issues of having to scream over parents or coaches.
On this day, all parents are required to remain quiet to players and referees with the exception on cheering on good plays. Coaches at all ages/birth years (except the youngest age groups U8/9) are only allowed to yell out to referees when making a substitution as well as positional instructions during those changes.
As parents, grandparents, coaches, referees, and fans, we all need to remember that our words and actions truly matter. Silent Sundays allow our players to problem solve and play simply for the love of the game while allowing referees to simply manage the match. We can quickly forget that the point of youth sports is the “youth.” Let’s keep the fun in the game, the joy in the spirit of our players, and remain aware that what we say and do matters.
Regardless of it being a “Silent Sunday” or any game day – from our recreational program through high school sports – let’s keep the comments positive and the cheering happy. The players will remember what you said and did in terms of how it made them feel for years to come. This also goes for the young referees – remember they are also somebody’s child, please treat them with respect. Thank you for your support in this endeavor!